6 weeks, 2 days

So yesterday was exciting.

I got my diploma from Miami officially stating my Master's status.

And we heard our little nugget's heartbeat.

I had totally talked myself out of even the chance we'd hear a heartbeat.  I knew it was 50/50 and I didn't want to be disappointed.  But it was clear as day and beating strong at 119 bpm.  The doctor said above 100 is what they want to see.  We also received our EDD (estimated due date) which is May 8th, 2012.  Mark your calendars, people.  This will be a day to celebrate.

And we got ultrasound pictures.  Sure, it looks a little like a teeny blob, but it's proof that something is cooking in there.  I needed a picture to confirm.

Yes, we celebrated.  Normal people hug and kiss, and yeah we did that... but then we ate.  I wanted to head in the direction of The Greene and we ended up at Cheesecake Factory.  Normally I am all about Cheesecake Factory.  The menu is HUGE and could satisfy even the pickiest eater.  But not necessarily a pregnant eater.  There were certain dinners that sounded good, but then they'd have an element to make it off-limits like bleu cheese or raw fish.  I am NOT complaining, but it was definitely a different kind of experience.  In case you wondered, I settled on salmon, mashed potatoes and broccoli.  I ate maybe 1/50th of the entire meal.  Why do restaurants serve such ginormous portions??

Then today when I was getting ready for school I tried on at least 4 outfits and settled on the one I didn't look as massive in.  I know I'm not showing--the baby is the size of a grain of rice for crying out loud--but I am definitely feeling puffier than usual.  It's totally gross.  I may have to go back into my summer dresses, even though they also make me look pregnant... wait, I am pregnant.  Is it okay to look pregnant when you shouldn't look pregnant and it's just because your're bloaty?  There has to be some Yiddish word for this... Grandma Marge, wish you had a computer and could help me out here!

And so far we haven't told any friends or family.  It's pretty weird keeping this a secret.  Okay, it's also weird to be blatantly lying about it.  I have really tried to cover my tracks, but there are probably suspicions anyway.  We went to Valley Vineyard and I didn't drink.  I'm positive that raised some eyebrows.  Tomorrow is Ashlie's Scentsy party.  With booze.  And baby spies.  I think I'll get a glass of wine and hold it.  Maybe that'll give me a few more weeks.  Or I'll just lie some more.

**For those of you who I did lie to (there are too many to name... sad, I know), please understand it wasn't meant to upset you.  I try very hard not to be a liar, but this was such a personal and special secret that Adam and I wanted to keep to ourselves until the time was right.  We love you!**

5 weeks, 4 days

Well we did it!

We actually found out two weeks ago, when I was like 3 seconds pregnant.  After so many years trying, Adam and I were a bit shocked to see what a positive pee stick looked like.

***I'm terrified that someone we know is going to see this, and we haven't told a soul yet... so if you stumble upon this site and you know us, please play dumb. ;) ***

It's taken us quite a long time to make a baby.  Here’s our freaky long fertility resume:

December 2008: Adam and I get married and stop using BCP.  We are officially not trying, not preventing.

Julyish 2009: We actively begin trying TTC (Trying to Conceive).
December 2009: At my annual OB/GYN appointment I mention that “we might have been trying to start a family and is it normal to not be preggo yet?”  Doc says wait 6 more months before panicking.  He also recommends charting with BBT.  I drive straight to CVS and buy the special thermometer.
July 2010: Per doctor’s suggesting, panic sets in.
August & October 2010: I have various tests done to diagnose a potential problem.  The details are hazy, but I gave loads of blood.  I also had an HSG performed to check the status on my Fallopian tubes.  Adam had a sperm analysis.  All results came back normal.
November 2010: OB/GYN says he has exhausted all tests and the next step is to meet the RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist).  Nurse kindly books me an appointment up at Kettering Hospital for December.
December 2010: Meet the RE, feel like I’m definitely in the right place, feel more hope.  RE says he will put me on a low dose of Clomid to boost follicle size/number (where the eggie lives) plus a trigger to ensure ovulation.  I am certain it will work the first time.
January 2011: First cycle on 50mg Clomid + Ovidrel trigger=BFN (Big F-ing Negative)
February 2011: 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel=BFN
March 2011: 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel=BFN
April 2011: 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel=BFN
May 2011: Two large cysts discovered on my right ovary during the CD3 ultrasound.  RE puts me on BCP to shrink.  Adam and I are devastated.
June 2011: Cysts gone! 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel=BFN  Adam and I also met with the RE to talk about a new game plan.  We decide to add IUI.
July 2011: 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel + IUI=BFN  We decide to stop Clomid and begin new meds (Femara).
August 2011: Femara + Ovidrel + IUI=BFP on 12DPO!!!!

So here we are today.  :)  I am officially 5 weeks, 4 days pregnant, which is like really, barely pregnant.  We are cautiously excited, hence the fact that we've told nobody (okay, Lucy knows).  Actually, I’m TOTALLY excited, but know that I shouldn’t count my chickens before they hatch.  Literally.

I've had my blood drawn multiple times to confirm beta numbers (hcg) and progesterone:
7dpo (days past ovulation) progesterone: 27
14dpo beta: 185
16dpo beta: 513; progesterone: 34.8
23dpo beta: 8993; progesterone: 26.8


My symptoms so far have included:
(daily) sore/tender boobies, pulling in my uterus, fatigue, lack of appetite (weird!)
(sometimes) nausea, headaches


Next appointment is on Wednesday (6w, 1d) for an ultrasound.  I thought infertility made me a nervous wreck... this just might be even worse.  The anticipation is unbelievable.  In the meantime, Adam and I still trying to swallow the fact that we’re actually pregnant… that we actually saw BFPs… that we’re going to start the family we’ve dreamed about for years.  :)